About Me

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just another 20-something stumbling through life, one mile at a time.

Friday, February 20, 2015

fitness friday: do you know where your next great sweat is?

one of the coolest things about being a Sweat Pink Ambassador is being in the know of new fitness news, like a studio opening in SF. even cooler is getting dibs to try it out and inviting friends to work out with me at a discount! Uforia Studios has an awesome studio in Palo Alto and they're bring their enthusiasm for a great sweat to Nob Hill. it's great mix of something for everyone: spin, yoga, cardio, dance...so many ways to get moving and fit.

as i mentioned in a previous post, i'm training for a marathon again and i'm trying to keep pushing myself to try new things. i'm not a coordinated person but i'm forcing myself to branch out and try hip hop classes at Uforia. i'll be the one in the back trying to know look like fish out of water, flailing my arms about and probably tripping over my own feet. it's gonna be great!

i'm also looking forward to getting my ass kicked in spin classes since i haven't been to one in years. with the energetic pump up music they play no one should be able to hear me wheezing my way through class. again, it's gonna be great!

i really can't wait to try all the different classes in a shiny new studio for my cross training. over the years and many attempts of running a marathon i've learned so so very important cross training is. seriously, it's more important than running sometimes. the more cross training i do the better overall fitness i have and the more i can sustain higher mileage training.  whether your fitness goals are for a race PR, lose weight, gt stronger, or look good naked (don't worry, we all secretly want that!) the best way to achieve that is to mix it up and try out different work outs. and now you can experience the best sweat of your life at Uforia SF  AND save 50% off a 10- or 20-class package with the code LOVERUNPINK. if you're still hesitant to commit that much, you can use the code for half off a single drop in class too. win-win either way!

my friends at Fit Approach passed along this do/don'ts list for my first hip hop class:

- Don't wear the loosest clothes you own, you might shake them off!  (got it, no free shows! ;))
- Don't be afraid to push the envelope, wear a hat or bandana o something that makes you feel a little more bad ass (pshhh i'm a bad ass everyday!)
- Don't hide near the back of the class; the best way to learn is when you can see the rockstar instructors in full view. (ok ok, but i blame you guys if i end up not so gracefully smacking my neighbors)
- Do smile while you sweat and don't forget your water bottle! (pretty sure i can just look in the mirror and laugh at myself hip hopping)
- Do harness your inner Beyonce- feel free to wear things that shimmer (would queen bey approve of a tiara?)
-Do wear your most comfortable shoes (decisions decisions- my collection is up to 28 pairs now!)

come laugh with/at me, sweat/spin/dance it out and challenge yourself! and look for upcoming pictures (and maaaaaybe a video) of my (mis)adventures.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

running scared

i remember my first track meet. it was at a local high school and i was a scrawny, shy, slightly insecure sixth grader. i was running the mile and i was at the start line feeling my heart beat way too fast and my hands getting sweaty. i was the only person from my school running this event and i hated that there was an audience. i was thinking how maybe joining track was a terrible idea (even though my friends and crush were doing it, which was the only reason why i signed up). i was a competitive kid in the sense that i always wanted to do my best and do well. ok, i was a perfectionist. but now i was competing in a sport that was more of an individual effort than a team. now there was more focus on me and i was terrified of falling flat on my face.

i came in sixth place that race and got a ribbon which is in a box somewhere in my parents' garage. that first race taught me a lot since i didn't do as well as i'd hoped but i also managed to overcome the race anxiety to finish. like so many things in life, i'm often terrified of taking that first step without any idea of what the outcome will be. usually it's a balance of being pleasantly surprised and mildly disappointed. the first race of my running career wasn't great or terrible but i did finish the season with several medals and records, some of which i think stand today. life lesson: push through and chase dreams.

that was almost two decades ago (holy crap i'm getting old!) and i'm still trying to remember to push through and chase dreams. I'm still running scared at times, literally and figuratively. i'm training for the Boston marathon and i'm terrified of getting injured before then, of not training hard enough, of even running itself at times. my vision is unpredictable and sometimes i have bad days without any warning. i went for a run last week and felt like i couldn't get into a groove and also had more flashing lights in my vision than usual. one of the scariest things about going blind is how it will affect running for me. it already has since i can't race solo (at this time i want to shout out to the amazing guides i've had for past races, especially julie who ran CIM with me and got me to a BQ and Sammie, who will be my guide for Boston. running 26.2 for someone else is so incredibly generous in both spirit and time). i can't run in low light setting at dusk or dawn and forget any night running. i also sometimes have trouble on trails, i have ot be extra vigilant when crossing streets. and sometimes, like last week, i have to stop until the flashing lights clear up a little more. when i run a lone i run much slower since i need more time to scan so i won't trip or hit things. these all suck out some of the joy of running. and yes, i can run with people and it makes it a little easier, but it's not the same. running alone is about being free and enjoying the solitude for me. i'm losing that and it's been more difficult than i ever imagined.

february is Retinitis Pigmentosa Awareness Month. lately i've been really fucking aware of my RP and what seems to be increasing limitations on my life. i've been living with it for over a decade and sometimes it feels like i've gotten better at coping and adjusting, like laughing at myself when i almost trip over something or walk into a chair. and sometimes i feel like break down over small things, like knocking over a full glass like i did this morning. i literally set down the glass in front of me on the counter a minute before completely missing it in my vision field and knocking it over. it wasn't a terrible mess to clean up and nothing was ruined or broken, except i broke down crying. it's always going to be a mourning process because my eyes are dying. i'm not giving up on living a full life, but i sometimes wonder if maybe you can't always pick up the pieces. maybe some pieces can never be put back together and they're lost forever. sometimes it's hard to let go of those pieces and that's when i realize how fucking exhausting it is to battle and struggle every day. even small incidences that seems harmless can be so frustrating and hurtful. i can't tell you how many times a day i "lose" things that are right in front of me. my sunglasses will be six inches from me on the table but it might as well be hidden under the couch. someone tries to show me something on their phone and it's right in my face but i don't even notice. tiny little hits that add up to thousands of moments can really take a toll on you. and then there are the bigger things, like when the power went out in my building and i had to finish packing for a flight. i basically had a panic attack because i could barely see a thing in my room during the middle of the day. there's a tree that blocks my window so only small patches of natural light come through, and while a person with healthy vision would manage to see well enough i was struggling physically and emotionally. even using a computer is a strain since i often lose the cursor on the screen. i spend probably half my time searching for things and half my time trying not to bump into things.

one thing i loved about track was that even though there were individual events that you won or lost on your own there was also a team behind you. you could lose one race and still win as a team. you had others to cheer you on and push you to be better, and vice versa. and i'm really lucky that i have family and friends who are on my team  to help me get through the bad days and cheer me on until the end of the race. a great quote i heard recently is by the late stuart scott who battled cancer for nearly a decade while still being an upbeat ESPN anchor. i watched his ESPY speech and this was my favorite part: 

"So live. Live! Fight like hell. And when you get too tired to fight, then lay down and rest and let somebody else fight for you."

this applies to all of us because we each have our own demons and battles to fight, and we each need others to help push us through and chase our dreams

i'm still running scared but i keep trying to remind myself it's not about the finish line. it's about taking that first step and to keep moving forward.